Lavender & Lace

Don't Waste Your Life

2008-04-20T12:39:00.000-07:00

John Piper writes, “I will tell you what a tragedy is. I will show you how to waste your life. Consider this story from the February 1998 Reader’s Digest: A couple ‘took early retirement from their jobs in the Northeast five years ago when he was 59 and she was 51. Now they live in Punta Gorda, Florida, where they cruise on their 30-foot trawler, play softball and collect shells. . . .’ Picture them before Christ at the great day of judgment: ‘Look, Lord. See my shells.’ That is a tragedy.

“God created us to live with a single passion: to joyfully display his supreme excellence in all the spheres of life. The wasted life is the life without this passion. God calls us to pray and think and dream and plan and work not to be made much of, but to make much of him in every part of our lives.”

Most people slip by in life without a passion for God, spending their lives on trivial diversions, living for comfort and pleasure, and perhaps trying to avoid sin. This book will warn you not to get caught up in a life that counts for nothing. It will challenge you to live and die boasting in the cross of Christ and making the glory of God your singular passion. If you believe that to live is Christ and to die is gain, read this book, learn to live for Christ, and don’t waste your life!

http://www.desiringgod.org/

Reality

2008-04-20T12:34:00.000-07:00

To learn more about Ray Comfort and The Way of the Master, his ministry, and how you can become a child of God, visit his website:

http://www.wayofthemaster.com/

The 200 Year Plan

2008-04-20T12:28:00.000-07:00

A Practicum on Multi-Generational Faithfulness

“To achieve victory, first you must seek it.”

Do you aspire for your children and grandchildren to thrive in their life-work before the Lord rather than just “survive” the influences of our bankrupt culture? If so, now is the time to prepare for this. For our children to be mighty in the land, we must embrace a long-term vision of victory, and this will only be achieved if we take steps now to plan and implement multi-generational goals for our families.

Enter The 200 Year Plan: A Practicum on Multi-Generational Faithfulness, a series of messages by Doug Phillips and Geoffory Botkin geared at helping families develop creative approaches to implement a 200-year plan through the culture of family life and the legacy of godly experiences, wisdom, and vision which parents leave to their children.

Inside this wonderful album comes with over 11 hours of audio and a bonus CD: PowerPoint Presentation Slides (PDF format).

Topics Include:
Strategic Considerations for a Multi-Generational Vision
Seven Secrets of Successful Multi-Visionaries
200 Year Plans That Succeeded
The Family Toledoth
The Family Enterprise
The Family Catechism
How to Draft a 200 Year Plan
The Family Investiture
Armchair Discussions

Purchase Here

NBS Now Available

2007-10-20T10:42:00.001-07:00

Now available on www.NeverbeShaken.blogspot.com

Check it out!

We made it!!!

2007-10-12T22:01:00.000-07:00

Never be Shaken made it into the Young Filmmaker's category of the San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival! Praise the Lord!
Only 40 out of 140 entries were choosen to be shown at the festival.
The festival will be October 25-27

My Men

2007-05-31T11:20:00.001-07:00

WATCHING ROMEO

Then God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be good for you; and to every bird of the sky and to every thing that moves on the earth which has life, I have given every green plant for food"; and it was so.

And God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day.

The Truth, Incoming

2007-05-26T17:33:00.000-07:00

Yea!! We've been waiting for this museum to open for a few years. God is faithful, His people have been faithful to support them, and they're ready to open to the public and let them know they really can believe every word of the Bible, God's truth is to be believed, from beginning to end! His word is relevant to every area of our lives. Yes, still today!! and tomorrow and forever!
My children have been so excited they have been supporting this project by sending their tithes to help in their own way! Praise God! For more information on the Creation Museum you can visit their website: http://www.creationmuseum.org/

Click to watch ABC News video report on the Creation Museum.

Take Back the Years

2007-05-25T14:01:00.000-07:00

Courtship vs. Dating

2007-05-11T14:02:00.000-07:00

"Heather, how would you like to go to a movie Saturday night?" Our daughter hesitated. Although she didn't know the young man standing before her in the college student union, she wouldn't accept his offer- at least not yet. Instead his inquiry needed to be directed to her father. Would the young man be offended or think she was some kind of weirdo? Heather mustered her resolve. "Well," she said, "I would really prefer that you talked with my dad first." Then, without giving the fellow a chance to respond, Heather made a beeline for her dormitory. I'm never going to hear from this guy again, she thought. In fact, I'm going to be the laughingstock of the campus.

Early Beginnings

Heather, the oldest of our four children, has been a willing participant in our family decision to dispense with the dating game. The decision may seem hopelessly old-fashioned to you, but our choice grew partly out of personal experience; as teenagers ourselves, we had encountered some of the drawbacks and dangers of dating. When I (Anne) dated, my heart became emotionally tied to my steady, which created wounds of rejection that lasted for years. We wanted something better for our children.

One of the best ways we've found to do that is courtship. Courtship can mean different things in different circles, but for our family it means that if a young man wants to date one of our daughters, he contacts the father and asks to take the daughter out. (Of course, the mother can take this role in families where the father is not available.)

At this very first meeting or phone call, the father explains that the family believes in courtship, which means that the young man must be spiritually and financially prepared to marry her if they fall in love. Otherwise, don't even bother starting a relationship. There are no casual "tryouts" in courtship. (As for our sons, they know they must meet the same guidelines before they can begin courting a young woman.)

Since courtship is reserved only for young couples spiritually and financially ready for marriage, this effectively means no courtship or dating during the high school years, and perhaps not until after college graduation.

Before we heard about courtship, the advice we received from many Christian friends was to allow our children to date once they reached their 16th birthday. Thus, when our twin sons, Ned and Drew, turned 16 they began closely observing the dating scene. When they saw the broken hearts and hurt feelings following the latest school break-ups, they believed there had to be a better way to protect their emotions while learning to be friends with the opposite sex.

The boys prayed long and hard about the situation. Finally, with Ned leading the way, he decided he would not date until he met the girl he thought he would marry--and then only when he was prepared to support her. This decision stemmed from having been trained by us to follow the Lord wholeheartedly.

Ned's conclusion--which took place before our family embraced the concept of courtship--will seem radical to some. Likewise, Heather's story at the beginning of this article may seem like a story from the 1890's, especially for today's young people in their collegiate years. Indeed, the fellow who wanted to go out with Heather did call our home, but after hearing Jim's explanation of courtship, he opted not to pursue the relationship.

That incident happened nearly six years ago. Since then, we have continued to practice courtship and, as parents with four adult children in their 20's, we have seen some very encouraging results, including their desire to be available to the Lord. Before you dismiss the idea as impractical, outmoded or just plain weird, take some time--as we did--to weigh the benefits of courtship against the drawbacks of dating.

Courtship vs. Dating

We believe courtship has physical, emotional and spiritual safeguards over dating. For starters, dating can be a set-up for divorce. The current thinking goes like this: If I like this guy (or girl), I'll go out with him a few times. If it doesn't work out, we can always break up. It simply does not make sense to train for a long-term marriage by pursuing what all too often is a series of short-term relationships.

Even in a lasting marriage, the baggage left over from previous dating relationships can be frustrating and painful. As Christian parents, we talk a lot about sexual abstinence, but what we would also keep in mind is the need for emotional abstinence.

Dating, by its very nature, opens the door to heartache and disappointment. Courtship, on the other hand, is a process by which young people can get to know and enjoy one another while maintaining their physical and emotional integrity.

Courtship also offers practical benefits. For one thing, bringing Dad into the picture takes the responsibility for saying yes or no to a relationship off a daughter's shoulders. If Heather is not interested in a young man, I (Jim) can break the news gently without damaging their friendship or the young man's walk with Christ.

Perhaps the biggest benefit of courtship is that it also allows us, as a family, to better understand the person interested in one of our children. Dating waves goodbye at the door and says "Be home by midnight," whereas courtship includes time spent with the entire family. In our home, a young man interested in Heather or Catharine is apt to find himself playing basketball with Ned and Drew, or helping out in the kitchen after dinner.

How does courtship work?

While the benefits of courtship are intriguing, folks may balk at changing the way they've looked at relationship building between the sexes. Dating, as it has evolved in the 20th century, is readily accepted and understood. It seems"normal," but is it?

Courtship, on the other hand, introduces a different set of guidelines and behaviour patterns. If a young man is interested in a young woman, he starts by praying about the relationship. With a go-ahead from the Lord and his parents, he then approaches the girl's parents. The parents pray and, if the young woman has a reciprocal interest in the young man, her father talks through courtship and its expectations with the fellow.

Before a young man and woman actually begin courting, the girl's father and the interested fellow spend time getting to know one another. This relationship may be built through shared activities or--in cases where the two do not live near one another-through letters and telephone calls.

As we prayed about God's choice of a spouse for each of our children, we have focused on five areas of personal development that we feel are critically important--both in development that w feel are critically important--both in our children and in their future mates. Each person should demonstrate spiritual depth, a strong biblical character, financial responsibility, sexual and emotional purity, and the ability to lead a simple, practical life.

Courtship activities may include a family missions trip, prison ministry, or similar service-oriented endeavors. The idea is to give the young couple an opportunity to spiritually mature as they fulfill God's call on their lives. Other activities--from family games to neighborhood walks--can shape and reveal a person's character, responsibility and resourcefulness. By allowing for this practical and productive time together, courtship enables a young couple to look beyond physical attraction to focusing on things that are truly important.

Catharine, our youngest, said it best when she described courtship as a way of "training my heart, my eyes, my thoughts and my emotions on becoming like Christ." Since courtship provides relational guidelines and boundaries for young couples, Catharine maintains that the process allows her to "concentrate my energies on doing what God wants me to do, rather than on what I want to do."

Will you pray about it?

When we began our courtship experiment, we had no idea what to expect. We've experienced challenges--like the time one of our children became seriously interested in a person who, we later realized, was not the right choice in God's eyes . Looking back, though, we can count more than a few blessings that have grown out of our commitment to courtship. When Heather realized that the courtship concept could work, even on a college campus, she told us, "Hey, guys are actually going for this stuff!"

As we've practiced courtship, our family has enjoyed more rewards than we would have ever dreamed possible. So far, none of our children (ages 20 through 25) is married, but we aren't worried, since we know God has a plan for their lives. We also know plenty of families where courtship has been successful.

But like so many things that we've tried or experienced as a family, courtship had brought us together in laughter and in tears, and it has encouraged us to pray. We pray for our family as a whole, for each individual family member, and for each of our children's prospective spouses, as God prepares them for marriage.

No matter how old your children are, or how many years they may have before dating becomes an issue, we want to encourage you to take time to pray specifically about this subject. This article may be your first exposure to the concept of courtship. On the other hand, you may know far more than what we've presented here.

Either way, ask the Lord to show you whether--and how--you should participate in the courtship process. Our hope and prayer is that you, too, will know the joy this time in your children's lives can bring.

Jim Ryun is a former three-time Olympian and world-record holder in the mile. He and Ann, along with their adult children, operate Jim Ryun Ministries in Lawrence, Kan. The Ryuns were assisted in this article by Jodie Berndt of Atlanta.

Resources

Books

*Dating vs. Courtship by Paul Jehle (Plymouth Rock Foundation, call 800-210-1620)

*Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot (Revell, call 800-759-4569)

*Guidlines for Courtship and Preparation for Marriage by Jeff Barth (Parable Publishing House, call 802-462-2002)

For other books, videos and cassettes on courtship, contact the Courtship Connection, 3731 Cecelia, Toledo, OH 43608 or call 419-729-4594

Pamphlets

Available from Last Days Ministries (P.O. Box 40, Lindale, TX 75771, or call 903-963-8678):

* "In Search of Mr. Right" pamphlet No. 6

* "Modesty" No. 17

* "Training Your Child for Christ" No. 77

This article from Focus on the Family, November 1995, by Jim and Anne Ryun

Marriage vs. Cohabitation

2007-05-11T13:38:00.000-07:00

His Word is still our guide.
Hebrews 13:8 "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today, yes and forever."
2 Timothy 3:16 & 17 "All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work."

Thou shalt not commit adultery. Exodus 20:14

One man and one woman.
Genesis 2:18 The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." 23 "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman' for she was taken out of man." 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

What God has joined together, let no man put asunder.
Matthew 19:6 "Consequently they [husband & wife] are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."

By the numbers, divorce just isn't what it used to be.
From YAHOO! News

From "Inspired by a True Story"
Divorce Proceedings
I am beginning a new project dealing with the personal and social consequences of divorce.
The first resource I’ve turned to in my research is Jen Abbas’ book Generation Ex.
In the first few pages I found a quote where she articulates an idea that has been simmering in the back of my mind a long time.
Abbas writes:
“Even if you think you don’t have any lingering issues, I invite you to discover how…divorce has changed your life. You did not experience the fullness of what God designed for you in a family, and so you have been hurt. It’s just that you are part of a generation that has learned to see these scars as normal.”
When it comes to understanding post-60’s generations, this point cannot be overemphasized. The confusion, the hedonism, the anxiety we see in young people today must be understood in light of the collapse of the family unit that was designed to provide a life-long sense of security and direction.
My parents are not divorced. But even people like me whose families remain intact are deeply affected by a culture that takes divorce and its aftermath to be normal.
I remember being a child and playing with some other boys on a hill near our home. Gary told us about how his parents had split up and he’d gone before the judge to say whether he wanted to live with his mom or dad.
The story horrified me. Even though the experience had not been mine, I was able to imagine myself having to make such a terrible choice. The divorce of my friend’s parents made me less secure in believing my own parents would stay together.
We tend to think divorce is a private matter. Most people have forgotten the issue once had a political angle. Kids in my generation and subsequent ones have been damaged not only by our own divorcing parents, but by every legislator and governor who helped enshrine no-fault divorce in law and by every activist who agitated for the change.
It is hard when you grow up in a divorce culture to see that the cynicism, suspicion about relationships, and insecurity of your peers is not normal, but the result of society’s approval of the get-single-quick scheme of no-fault divorce. There aren’t many places to look for another model.
I am interested in hearing stories of how people have been affected by their parents’ divorces. If you are willing to share what coming of age in a divorce culture has meant for you, leave your story in the comment thread, or email me at deansblog at yahoo.com.

2007-01-11T13:56:00.000-08:00

"Global warming is caused by the Son."
I saw this bumper sticker the other day and thought it was appropriate to go with this post.

Global Warming

2007-01-10T13:36:00.000-08:00

Large Families Ruining the Planet, Environmentalists Claim
by Wendy Cloyd, assistant

Experts call it 'ridiculous' to say having more than two children is bad for Earth.
In order to stop global warming, people should recycle, drive smaller cars and limit procreation – at least according to a paper published today by Britain’s Optimum Population Trust (OPT).
“The most effective personal climate-change strategy is limiting the number of children one has,” the report states. “The most effective national and global climate-change strategy is limiting the size of the population.”
John Guillebaud, co-chairman of OPT, claimed if a couple has two children instead of three, it cuts the family's carbon dioxide output by the equivalent of 620 return flights from London to New York each year.
"The effect on the planet of having one child less is an order of magnitude greater than all these other things we might do, such as switching off lights,” he said. “The decision to have children should be seen as a very big one and one that should take the environment into account.”
Stuart Shepard, a meteorologist and spokesman for Focus on the Family Action, said humans should never be placed on a scale against the amount of carbon dioxide they produce.
“We are created in the image of God,” he said, “and to say the planet would be better off without us contradicts the design of Creation."
Dan Gainor, director of the Business & Media Institute and Boon Pickens Free Market Fellow, said it's ridiculous that an organization touting itself as an environmental group is against one of the planet’s species.
“Human beings are the greatest resource we have on the planet,” Gainor said.
Such groups view people and animals as equals, he said. “But we’ve somehow ‘altered the balance,’ so that makes us bad.”
In the eyes of extreme environmental groups, the grizzly bear that attacks you in the wild is doing its job, Gainor said. In the eyes of those same groups, the activity of mankind is evil.
The OPT report came on the same day that Gainor found an article online by Paul Watson, founder of the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, who described humans as “the AIDS of the Earth.”
“This is the extreme, utterly bizarre end of the environmental movement that you see in science fiction movies,” Gainor said. “That’s how they view human beings – but conveniently never themselves. They think they’re the great enlightened ones.”
Shepard said such a mindset is obviously flawed.
"It's obvious to the rest of us that there's something fundamentally wrong with seeing everything on planet Earth as 'natural' except for the humans,” he said. “Why are we always viewed as if we were alien beings dropped on the planet by mistake?"
The OPT paper and the writings of Watson, Gainor said, are not isolated incidents.
“We’ve had Sheryl Crow calling for people to use less toilet paper; we’ve had Al Gore on Capitol Hill,” Gainor said. “And right now Congress is still considering a bill that would mandate what light bulbs we can use. This is the eco-movement. This is what Congress is acting on right now.”
Shepard said the report illuminates that the debate over global warming has never been about science – it's all about politics. "Global-warming alarmism is not a scientific issue that found political support," he said, "this is a political movement that was looking for something to exploit in hopes of attaining elected office."

Good Reading

2007-01-09T13:14:00.000-08:00

What the Bible Says About Having Children

Can you imagine attending a wedding where the family of the bride prayed for her to have vast legions of children who would grow up to have dominion in the land for the glory of God? This was precisely the blessing offered by the sisters of Rebekah upon her marriage to Isaac. These sentiments beautifully harmonize with Scripture passage after Scripture passage which extol the virtue of trusting the Lord to control the womb and the necessity that believers be fruitful and multiply. For six-thousand years, believers viewed children as a blessing and reward of the Lord greatly to be desired. It was widely accepted that those who cut off their seed usually did so in violation of the express commands of God. Only in the last seventy-five years have child prevention and birth control become acceptable in the Church. Perhaps more than any other philosophical shift in the history of the Church, the modern anti-child philosophy has changed the way we view the role of fathers and mothers as well as the meaning of family life and multi-generational faithfulness. But genuine questions persist: Does the Bible address the question of child prevention? Is cutting off the godly seed ever an act of “good stewardship?” Are economic considerations a valid biblical ground for closing the womb? What about “natural” family planning? What about families that cannot have children? Is the widespread use by Christians of the “pill,” a child prevention device with abortifiacient potential, bringing judgment on the Church? Be Fruitful and Multiply answers these questions and makes the case that Christians should do more than just “trust God” for children, we should cry out to the Lord to bless the fruit of the womb.

By Nancy Campbell, Foreword by Douglas W. Phillips

Be Fruitful and Multiply

2007-01-08T10:11:00.000-08:00

Ken Carpenter Featured on ABC's Nightline
Statistically speaking, there are really only two key groups having many children. The first are Muslims. The second are Christians (often home educators) whose hearts have turned to Christ and then to home, and who see the blessing of the fruit of the womb as God’s reward.
Now the secular world is beginning to take notice of this trend towards fruitful wombs. If you have not seen it already, you might be interested to watch the nationally broadcast interview with Ken Carpenter on the joy of large families. Ken is a tremendous man, a personal friend, and a featured speaker at the 2006 Christian Filmmakers Academy. He was interviewed on ABC News Nightline. I am grateful for his bold stand for the blessing of the fruit of the womb.
Posted by Doug Phillips
Be sure and watch the video!
http://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/story?id=2767898&page=1

The Overpopulation Myth

2007-01-07T18:28:00.000-08:00

Brian recently finished a book called Fewer: How the New Demography of Depopulation Will Shape Our Future by Ben J. Wattenberg. Very interesting.

From Publishers Weekly
What starts off as a persuasive statistical analysis dwindles into demagoguery in Wattenberg’s latest demographic exploration. Wattenberg (The Real America; The Birth Dearth), expanding on previous work, offers a detailed breakdown of trends toward global depopulation. The previous population projections, he considers, grossly overestimated peak population numbers, and even current U.N. projections, he says, tend toward the high side. The discrepancies are due to dramatically decreasing fertility rates throughout the world, he argues, making population growth rate much slower than anticipated. He predicts that after peaking in the next decades, the rate will drop sharply. Wattenberg’s book examines these numbers, their causes and their ramifications. Keeping his statistics comprehensible to the demographic novice, he makes a strong case against environmentalist praise of depopulation and skillfully analyzes the economic and social situations that might occur if his predictions play out. However, as Wattenberg surveys the reasons behind declining fertility rates, his arguments take an assertive turn. Wattenberg bemoans abortion, women who put careers before children, homosexuality and co-habitation without marriage—all with little of the statistical analysis that bolsters his initial arguments. Wattenberg himself says, "straightforward demographic numbers can engender mighty arguments," but doesn’t let his own numbers speak for themselves. Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

FREE

2006-12-21T09:11:00.000-08:00

FREE

Thank you dear Lord for saving my soul. Thank you dear Lord for making me whole.

You've given me strength through your Son's precious name.

He made me free by taking my blame.

The journey's so big, so sweet, & so vast.

No need to look back or dwell on the past.

You've opened the way to be truly free.

No bars could keep me from bowing my knee.

You give the power to leave all that staggers .......... the pain, hurt, & guilt,

the shame and the anger.

I don't need riches, crown, or a name.

Your Son did it all, I give Him the fame.

I now am empowered to share all Your love.

My burdens are lifted,

I'm light as a dove!

"If therefore the Son shall make you free, you shall be free indeed." John 8:36

The Making of America

2006-05-25T08:46:00.000-07:00

God, guns, and guts made America. Let's keep all three.

.....and My people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray, and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. 2 Chronicles 7:14

Robert Duncan

"TODAY IS TODAY"

2006-04-20T11:41:00.000-07:00

I was putting on my 3 yr. old's shoes and she looked up at me and said, "Today is today."
How simple..........How true!

.......now is the day of salvation. 2 Corinthians 6:2

Thank you, Lord, for daily bread

2006-03-16T15:19:00.000-08:00

ALL IN A DAY'S WORK

Here are our weekly 9 loaves. There is one missing, as we ate it for lunch. We have our eye on an electric grinder, as the hand grinding is quite a task. Each family memeber is supposed to grind their 2 cups worth of wheat! WOW! I have a lot of respect for those "women of old"! Who needs a health club???

For the bread of God is He which cometh down from heaven and giveth life unto the world. John 6:33

ON BENDED KNEE

2006-03-14T08:05:00.000-08:00

I search and yearn for something more, my heart needs yet to find

Yet flesh holds back the blessings, my sin holds back and binds

The enemy is prowling, a lion so I hear

To steal my joy and happiness, my life he wants to tear

On bended knee I need to bow, before my king so strong

For I'm so weak and lost in me, I feel it's all so wrong

But in the hour of my despair, His breeze comes gently in

To take hold and captive, each hurt and every sin.

He'll take away all my pain, the turmoil, hate, and shame

God had a plan, for all man, His death was not in vain

My broken heart and empty life, He's longing now to fill

I'll give my heart so trustingly, and toss my headstrong will

He didn't want to be apart, our life to be so separate

But paid the price, a sacrifice, for me to be at rest

So now His gift, I must take, .... life eternally

This offering He gave to us, He'd do it all for ME

For I'm a daughter of the King, to him a Royal Queen

A precious child, now innocent, His blood has washed me clean.

Mrs. HoneyBee 1996

I can not believe it has been 10 years! I never realized how much He had to offer, and He'd show me so much more of Himself. God is gracious, and merciful! He has eternal treasures stored up for us, unlike anything the world has to offer! If we'd just trust Him!

Now unto the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only wise God, be honour and glory for ever and ever. A-men.

1 Timothy 1:17

Daughters at Home

2006-03-10T14:43:00.000-08:00

A host of people seemed unhealthily curious about what my daughter did at home, during her teen years. I'm not sure what they thought was happening, and although I assured them that she was content and busy, well-meaning relatives and friends thought that she would not be fully formed in some way if she did not go to public school, have boyfriends, or attend all the activities of other girls her age.

One of the by-products of daughters at home is their thoughtful approach to life. Everything has a purpose and there is no peer pressure to be distracted from the quiet pleasures which help develop their minds.

My daughter spent a lot of time looking at me. I remember thinking I had a little shadow, when she was young. While I was washing dishes, sewing, or cleaning house, I would sense those big brown eyes in that face framed by dark brown hair, staring at me. I would connect my eyes with her for a moment and then she and I would go about doing the things that we were doing. When she was very young, say, about 4, she seemed to look at me every 15 minutes. She came from her bedroom every quarter of an hour and found me, looked at me, and then went back to her occupation of playing or looking at books. As years went by, she looked at me less, until when she was in her teens, she would only come into contact with me every hour or two. Most of that period was spent worldlessly by my side in the kitchen or sewing, yardwork, shopping. Now that she is grown, she calls me at least once a day, but not always. She has discovered that one of her children has this same tendency.

I think this kind of contact is very important for the mother and child. It is a special bonding that is broken when the child is sent to other people to be educated. Instead of forming a bond with the parents and siblings, the child develops friendships that, although can be rewarding, do not have the same strength as family connections. By the time she was 15 she was capable of taking over the responsibility of the home if I was tired, had to be away or was not feeling well. She married at 18, and has been married for almost 8 years, with three children. We noticed a lot of girls her age who thought she was being deprived of fun and parties and the free, single life of dating, did not fare so well in their lives. At a young age, many of them could not form good relationships, and already are sufferring from divorce.

One of the problems with dating is that it sets up a pattern of divorce. If you date someone for awhile, it should be for the purpose of marrying, however, most people don't date for that purpose. They just want to have fun. Then when they see something they like better, or if they have a little quarrel, they throw off that partner and find another one. The bonds that were formed are then severed, and there are a lot of hurt feelings on the path to finding the perfect mate. Most of the girls who thought we were crazy by protecting our daughter from dating, had difficulty being committed enough to marry, or finding someone committed enough to marry them. This is due to the dating mentality. Our son once wrote a tract about dating called, "Kissing, Hugging, and Dumping," because this is often what happens. Later, when some of these people get married, they have the same habits, which ultimately bring on marriage break up. If someone who has dated quite a lot, or has gone steady with someone, eventually marries, he faces the problem of the embarrassing contact with women he has dated before. Can you imagine walking arm in arm down the street with your husband or wife, and having to acknowledge and introduce a former boyfriend or girlfriend? Wouldn't it be better not to have "a past?"

When a girl has a settled way of life with her family at home, she will repel the guys who don't want the domestic type, and she will attract only the one who desires to settle down to the serious matter of marriage, home, and family. This kind of man may often have a strong bonding with his own parents, and want to reproduce that in his future life with his wife.

Some of the things my teen daughter did at home were routine. By this time, she had observed how the home operated for many years, and the routine was automatic to her. She often prepared meals because to her it was grown up and fun. She cleaned up the kitchen afterwards. She knew how to mop a floor, and straighten up a sitting room. She knew if this major work was done, she had time for even more exciting things like sewing, quilting, rubber stamping, letter writing, or hospitality. One of the highlights of her teen years was a type of cooking club that she formed. Once a month, she invited some girls to the house to cook and serve a meal to their parents. Each girl brought a recipe they had not ever tried before, and created a salad, a main dish, or a dessert. This helped them all learn more about cooking. These girls today still mention how helpful that was to them.

There were things she enjoyed besides homemaking that she did at home: she liked music a lot and after taking quite a few years of lessons, she set up her own studio in the home and taught piano to children. Stamps were just becoming available, so she made a greeting card business portfolio and took orders for cards. She also learned to quilt from books, and sold several quilts that she made.

One other thing that a daughter at home enjoys is planting a vegetable garden in the spring. Our daughter had a gardening diary, or notebook that you can buy, which had places to write the date certain things were planted, and were they were planted. It had a place where she could plan the garden. From a small raised bed, she grew an abundant amount of vegetables for the family.

Our family went into the Tea Party business, where we met many interesting people. One person we met was influential in the local newspaper, and asked our daughter to write a column for it each week, which she did via email, for several years.

Not all of her time was spent being productive. She had plenty of time to rest, and one of her favorite things to do was go retire early so she could read a good book. Her brothers used to complain, "I wish she had not found a book to read, because now I know she won't be playing with us for a long time!" When she lost herself in a book, the boys begged her to play with her. Growing tired of interruptions, she closed the door of her room. They then slipped notes under the door. When that didn't work, they went outside and tapped on her window. Eventually she had to give up and come out, lest the pestering continue.

I've met other daughters at home and not one of them regret being under their parents roof during those years. They slipped easily from their parents home to their husband's home, to continue and improve that way of life which they had enjoyed. These girls adjusted well to marriage, home and family.

posted by Lady Lydia on her blog http://homeliving.blogspot.com/

Cure For Winter Blues..........

2006-02-27T15:40:00.000-08:00

SERVE OTHERS AND SING PRAISES TO HIS NAME

Praise ye the Lord: for it is good to sing praises unto our God; for it is pleasant; and praise is comely" Psalm 147:1.

....for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Philippians 4: 11-13.

HE IS ABLE TO FILL ALL OF OUR INSUFFICIENCIES!

SERVING BRINGS TRUE JOY!!

Let love of the brethren continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13: 1-2.

Click Text to View
"I always sing more when I have company."

But in ALL these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. Romans 8:37

What do women really want?

2006-01-17T09:00:00.000-08:00

Daniel Ridgway Knight

Link to Article: They're Spoiling Eve's Great Con Game

A Call to Fathers

2006-01-17T08:53:00.000-08:00

Link to Article: The Greatest Untapped Evangelistic Opportunity Before the Modern Church; By Scott Brown

Ladies, we are parents too. Our children need to be taught of Christ daily. If not you, then who?

~Sweet Sisters~

2006-01-08T20:30:00.000-08:00

I Need Thee Every Hour

2006-01-05T09:20:00.000-08:00

Robert Duncan Studios ©2006
I NEED THEE EV'RY HOUR

Annie S. Hawks, 1835-1918

Refrain added by Robert Lowry

In the day of my trouble I will call upon Thee: for Thou wilt answer me.Psalm 86:7

This deeply personal hymn came from the heart of a busy housewife and mother who had no idea of the spiritual strength that her own hastily written words would bring her later during a sorrowful time in her life. The author, Annie S. Hawks, has left this account about the writing of her poem in 1872: One day as a young wife and mother of 37 years of age, I was busy with my regular household tasks. Suddenly I became filled with the sense of nearness to the Master, and I began to wonder how anyone could ever live without Him, either in joy or pain. Then the words were ushered into my mind and these thoughts took full possession of me.

Sixteen years later, Mrs. Hawks experienced the death of her husband. Years after, she wrote: I did not understand at first why this hymn had touched the great throbbing heart of humanity. It was not until long after, when the shadow fell over my way, the shadow of a great loss, that I understood something of the comforting power in the words which I had been permitted to give out to others in my hour of sweet serenity and peace.

One of the blessings of a victorious Christian life is knowing the closeness of our Lord in every circumstance of life. Like Annie Hawks, it is so important that we develop strong spiritual lives during the peaceful hours in order that we will be able to be victorious when difficulties come, which they surely will to everyone at some time.

I need Thee every hour, most gracious Lord;No tender voice like Thine can peace afford.

I need Thee every hour, stay Thou nearby;Temptations lose their power when Thou art nigh.

I need Thee every hour, in joy or pain;Come quickly and abide, or life is in vain.

I need Thee every hour; teach me Thy will;And Thy rich promises in me fulfill.

I need Thee every hour, most Holy One;O make me Thine indeed, Thou blessèd Son.

Refrain:I need Thee, O I need Thee;Every hour I need Thee;O bless me now, my Savior,I come to Thee.

*For Today*: Psalm 4:1, 119:86; John 15:4 & 5, 16:33; I Corinthians 10:13

Consciously practice walking close to the Saviour each hour so that whether there are times of joy or grief, you can acknowledge His "being there" to meet every need.

Music url: The Cyber HymnalTaken from Amazing Grace -- 366 Inspiring Hymn Stories for Daily Devotions © Copyright 1990 by Kenneth W. Osbeck. Published by Kregel Publications, Grand Rapids, MI. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

I think the reason this hymn is so special to me is that any mommy of several children can relate. Annie Hawks was a real person like me. She wrote this hymn as a young homemaker. She did not fully realize why it ministered to so many souls until later when she lost her husband.
Our calling can sometimes be overwhelming. We need to continually stand back and remember why we are doing what we are doing, catch our breath, and refocus on the goal, ask God to refresh us and give us a new heart.
Women are to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discrete, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God may not be blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5

When we come to Christ, it is not a “one time” deal and then it’s over. When we’re truly living for and serving Christ, sometimes it is moment by moment. The revelation comes when we see that we are inadequate and then humbly acknowledge our dependence on Him as our only survival. I DO NEED HIM EVERY HOUR…………… REALLY EVERY MOMENT!!!!
~Mrs. Honey Bee~

A Boy's Interpretation of proper etiquette

2006-01-04T09:39:00.000-08:00

As my daughter shared with us some wisdom from the etiquette book she was reading, her brothers gazed on with intense interest. She read an excerpt, "A real gentleman never wears his pants for 2 days at a time." My 8 year old son replied, "Well, I'm doing well, I wear mine for three!" (Oh Lord................... help me! ;-)

One of our next family books to purchase is:

Boyhood and Beyond : Practical Steps to Becoming a Man By: Bob Schultz
We have heard great things about this book and would appreciate any of your comments.

Description: Sow wise seeds of counsel in the still-soft soil of young hearts! Drawing from biblical insight and personal experience, Schultz offers your preteen boys reliable guidance on matters of authority, temptation, education, industry vs. sloth, leadership, overcoming fear, and more. Help future men make the most of boyhood---and begin training them for life. 219 pages, softcover from Great Expectations.

www.booksonthepath.com www.cbd.com

The Reality

2005-12-23T15:27:00.000-08:00

THE REALITY

Philippians 2:6-8, "Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: but made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: and being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedience unto death, even the death of the cross."

Much of what we see and experience of Christmas today is total antipathy to the birth of Jesus that we are supposed to be remembering. We have Christmas trees, decorations, lights, tinsel, Santa Claus, and an over abundance of food. The first Christmas was one of poverty, but Christmas today is commercialized and money is splashed around.

The first Christmas was a very humble one. It was not glamorous. Today, if a couple were so poor that they had to have their baby in a dirty animal stable, the Social Services would take their baby away from them. But 2000 years down the line, it seems that the humility of Christmas has been forgotten.

I think it would be good to remind ourselves of the true reality of Christmas, don't you?

The humility of Mary.

Mary was a humble maiden with a humble lineage. She was not a royal princess. She was not a High Priest's daughter. She was not rich. Mary herself confesses in her song, "He hath regarded the low estate of his handmaiden.... He hath put down the mighty from their seats, and exalted them of low degree..." (Luke 1:48-49) But God chose this unknown virgin to bring forth His precious Son. He chose her because she was a willing vessel. Often those who have everything materially, are not willing vessels.

God is not looking for riches and material possessions. He is looking for women with obedient hearts - mothers who will welcome to their hearts the children whom God has planned to send them. He is looking for those who have the same spirit Mary had when she said, "Be it unto me according to thy Word." (Luke 1:38) She was totally surrendered to the will of the Lord. In the face of poverty, ridicule, rejection and estrangement, she embraced this child who would be the Savior of the world.

I will never forget going to the famous art gallery in London and seeing a painting of Mary. It was such an anointed picture. The artist had captured the look of total submission and abandonment to the will of God upon her face. It was amazing. I looked and looked at it for hours. The caption was the very words, "Be it unto me according to thy Word."

The humility of Joseph.

Joseph was a humble carpenter from a humble village. Do you remember that Nathanael said of Jesus, "Can there any good thing come out of Nazareth?" (John 1:46) His own residents of Nazareth spurned him and asked, "Is not this the carpenter's son?" (Matthew 13:55)

The humility of His birthplace.

Jesus was born in a manger in a barn with the smells and messes of the animals all around.

Jesus was born to be King, but God didn't provide a palace for His Son in which to be born. He didn't provide a doctor, nurses and hospital. There was no cradle, beautifully draped with lace and frills. Only straw! Was there even that? No Christmas card paints the true reality of the scene.

If this was the beginning of the Son of God, why do we, the sons and daughters of God, expect that we should have all the niceties of life? Of course, if God blesses us with them, we will receive them with joy, but should we expect them? Everything surrounding the birth of Jesus was humble. It is interesting that in the body of Christ we have the "Faith movement" and the "Discipleship movement" and so on. But has anyone ever heard of the "Humility movement"? We don't take to this aspect so well, do we? And yet this is how God planned for His beloved Son to be born. And this is how he lived all through His life. Shouldn't humility also be the hallmark of our Christian experience?

Isn't it so amazing that God chose to bring forth His beloved Son through the process of birth? He could have sent him down from Heaven on a chariot of fire! He could have sent a legion of angels to escort Him from the majesty of heaven. But no! He chose for Jesus to be conceived and nurtured in a womb, to be born of a woman, the way that God planned for all human life to come into this world.

Surely this raises birth to a high estate. What a privilege to give birth and give life to children, the very same way that Jesus came into the world? How blessed we are as women.

The humility of Jesus' dedication.

After the days of a mother's purification, the parents took the baby to the temple to be dedicated. They had to bring a lamb to be sacrificed for the dedication. However, if they could not afford a lamb, they brought two turtle doves or young pigeons. (Leviticus 12:6-8) The account in Luke 2:23-24 tells us that Joseph and Mary brought doves or pigeons. They belonged to the poor class. They couldn't afford to bring a lamb. And yet God chose from the poorer class to bring forth the King of kings and Lord of lords.

We don't have to own our own home and have all the modern conveniences before we are ready to have a baby. All we have to have is willing and welcome hearts. God will always provide for the children He sends. The poor who have children are richer than the wealthy who reject children.

May you have a wonderful Christmas together with your family. May God keep all our hearts focused on the humility of His birth, rather than tinsel and toys.

Love from NANCY CAMPBELL

Prayer:
"Dear Lord Jesus, Thank you for leaving the glory of heaven to come to this earth. Thank you for humbling yourself to become a little baby. Thank you for being humiliated for me. Thank you that you came to die, and to die for my sin. How can I ever thank you adequately? But with all my being I worship and love you. Amen."

Quote:
Zechariah 9:9 NAS, "Behold your king is coming to you; He is just and endowed with salvation, humble, and mounted on a donkey, even on a colt, the foal of a donkey..."

If you know others who would be blessed by these devotions, you are welcome to forward them or let them know they can subscribe by sending a blank email to subscribers-on@aboverubies.org

Are You Enslaved By Bitterness?

2005-12-20T11:05:00.000-08:00

See Bible Study/Article on BITTERNESS

Have you or someone you know ever carried the heavy yoke of bitterness?
It is a dreadful burden to bear, and a poison that infiltrates every area of the mind and body. Like a crippling disease, it takes over the mind and if gripped for too long ruins a person’s health, and spills over onto every person around this poor, imprisoned soul. Proverbs 17: 22---…..a broken spirit dries up the bones.
Hebrews 12:12-15---Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather healed. Pursue peace with all men, and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled.
Jesus came that we might have life, and life abundantly. Don’t you long to be relieved of this burden? It takes a lot of time and energy to hold on, brooding over an idea, misgiving, or maltreatment. Proverbs 14:30-A tranquil heart is life to the body, but passion is rottenness to the bones.
By dying for us, Jesus broke those heavy chains of slavery. Reach out to Him and ask Him to set you free. Psalm 51:15-“And call upon Me in the day of trouble; I shall rescue you, and you will honor Me.” Holding on to bitterness is hurting you more than the ones you’re brooding over.. The pastures are greener on the other side of forgiveness….

Ephesians 4:31-32---Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

BITTERNESS IS A PRISON-THE ONLY WAY OUT IS FORGIVENESS:
Matthew 6:14-15: “For if you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.”
7:2- “For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you.”

“Oh God, purge me of all this ugly sin. Cut every vile thing out of me. Make me a vessel fit for Your indwelling presence, fit for Your glory. Oh God, “Not some of self and some of Thee, but NONE of self and ALL of Thee.” “Oh, to be saved from myself, dear Lord, O to be lost in Thee!” O that it might be no more I, but Christ that lives in me.” “Have Thine own way, Lord, have Thine own way. Hold over my being absolute sway. Fill with Thy Spirit till all shall see, Christ only and always living in me.”

For more info. click on the "Article on Bitterness" above the hands.

Train 'em Young!

2005-12-09T12:26:00.000-08:00

Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6

Here is a picture of our youngest little lady, delighting in the joy of homemaking. She is really a nice helper. Her sisters have done a fabulous job training her! He he he! She is busy chopping nuts, and I must say, does a fine job. We knew she'd be a good cook............after all she WAS born in the kitchen!
Mrs. Honey Bee

Raising Maidens of Virture~By Stacy McDonald

2005-12-09T10:46:00.000-08:00

More than a fashion statement~
make a purity statement!

Do you want your daughter to cherish her purity and honor God by the chaste and lovely way she presents herself?

More than a fill-in-the-blank Bible study, Raising Maidens of Virtue is an engaging tool for mothers to use in training daughters who are approaching womanhood to think biblically. Through stories, allegories, illustrations, and memory-making projects, Raising Maidens of Virtue covers topics such as guarding the tongue, idleness, sibling relationships, honoring parents, contentment, modesty, purity, cleanliness, and feminine biblical beauty.

Godly women are not born, but raised. Stacy McDonald has in this work equipped parents to be about the business of raising up rubies, or rather, that which is more precious still, our daughters. She is a faithful guide, for she is a godly example. - Dr. R. C. Sproul, Jr., Pastor,

Director of the Highlands Study Center , and most importantly, homeschooling father of six
In the face of our culture’s shameless enticement of young women to view their identity and worth only in terms of their sexuality, Stacy McDonald passionately challenges mothers and daughters together to return to a pure and gracious femininity for the God who made us uniquely for His glory. -Tracy Klicka, wife of Sr. Counsel for HSLDA, Chris Klicka

We need young women who cherish their purity and desire to honor their parents through chaste behavior, speech, and dress. We need girls of character who cultivate their minds and emotions to reflect God’s design with joy, intelligence, and delight. – From the Foreword by Jennie Chancey

www.booksonthepath.com

My daughters and I are currently doing this study together. BEAUTIFUL! What a lovely way to strengthen character and confidence as women and to build our relationships as sisters in Christ. You can NOT afford to be left behind on this one. Sincerely, Mrs. Honey-Bee

Homeschoolers and Socialization?

2005-12-07T19:24:00.000-08:00

Life in a shoe: Socialization

Did Johnny Guess?

2005-12-07T14:55:00.000-08:00

"I love you, Johnny," said mother one day,

"I love you more than I can say."

Then she answered his questions with,

"Don't bother me now,"

And just didn't have time to show him how

to tie his truck to his tractor and plough.

But she washed her windows and scrubbed the floor

and baked and cooked and cleaned some more.

"Bring the boy next door in?" Well I should say not!

You'll mess up the floors and I don't want a spot!"

"No, we don't have time for a story today,

Mother's too busy cooking, so run out and play.

Maybe tomorrow," she said with a sigh.

And Johnny went out almost ready to cry.

"I love you, Johnny," again she said,

As she washed his face and sent him to bed.

Now how do you think that Johnny guessed

Whether 'twas he or the house that she really loved best?

Unknown Author

from

Above Rubies Magazine

Issue # 65, pg. 20

www.aboverubies.org

Most Richly Blessed

2005-12-07T14:37:00.000-08:00

I asked God for strength, that I might achieve;
I was made weak
that I might learn to humbly obey.
I asked for Health, that I might do greater things;
I was given infirmity,
that I might do better things.
I asked for riches, that I might be happy;
I was given poverty,
that I might be wise.
I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men;
I was given weakness,
that I might feel the need of God.
I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life;
I was given life,
that I might enjoy all things.
I received nothing I asked for,
but EVERYTHING I hoped for.
Despite myself............... my unspoken prayers
were answered.
I am, among men, most richly blessed.

`Author unknown, found in the pocket of a dead soldier.`

Title of print above: The Prayer at Valley Forge

Created To Be His Help Meet~By Debi Pearl

2005-12-07T14:23:00.000-08:00

Somewhere over the passing years and changing culture, women have lost their way. This book is written to lead them back home. Regardless of how you began your marriage or how dark and lonely the path that has brought you to where you are now, I want you to know that it is possible today to have a marriage so good and so fulfilling that it can only be explained as a miracle.

Michael and Debi Pearl, married for 34 years, now have 5 happily married adult children and a growing number of grandchildren. They are the authors of To Train Up a Child, which has over 450,000 in print in English and is in many other languages. They are the founders of No Greater Joy Ministries. Check out the website at: www.NoGreaterJoy.org

I would love any comments regarding your experiences after reading this book.
xoxoxo MamaHoneyBee

THE GOAL

2005-12-07T14:05:00.000-08:00

~The Proverbs 31 Woman~

An eccellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.

The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.

She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

She looks for wool and flax, and works with her hands in delight.

She is like merchant ships; she brings her food from afar.

She rises also while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and portions to her maidens.

She considers a field and buys it; from her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She girds herself with strength, and makes her arms strong.

She senses that her gain is good; her lamp does not go out at night.

She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hands grasp the spindle.

She extends her hand to the poor; and she stretches out her hands to the needy.

She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

She makes coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies belts to the tradesmen.

Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future.

She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Her children ride up and bless her; her husband also and he praises her saying,

"Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all."

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Give her the product of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.

Proverbs 31:10-31 NAS

Family Reformation Magazine

2005-12-06T13:33:00.000-08:00

Encouragement for Families Today.
http://www.familyreformation.com/

Welcome~

2005-06-27T16:40:00.000-07:00